why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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My Nan, that is all.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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