What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

4 gay men walked into a bar. it was a gay bar. all 4 men had a good time

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...