What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Eddie Murphy's recent film career.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

thumb_up thumb_down -25

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is worse than being bitten by a snake? Being bitten twice! - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Male leadership.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops