An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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Black people being friendly.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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