How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's brown and sticky? Syrup.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

white or wheat? wheat please.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q) Why did the Koala fall out of the tree A) Because it was dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

thumb_up thumb_down -25

i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Niall Horan

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

69

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops