What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

Why Did the throw up He was sick

one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

srrsly, the fuk is going down here? read down It`s satanist rituals or something, Are there mmodderators that will remove this things seriusly!Moral stuf is satanism!!!!

" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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