Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

Knock knock Who's there? Amy winehouse Amy winehouse who? Amy winehouse died by falling down a flight of stairs.

Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

An atmosphere goes into one bar. Which is pretty normal since it is roughly the regular value of the atmospheric pressure on Earth at sea level

What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

"This is the best of all possible anti-jokes," said Pangloss.

Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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