The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

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How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

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(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

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What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

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why are chickens dying so fast? because black people are hungry.

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man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

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why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

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why is 6 afraid of 7? i don't know, ask 6

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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how do you poke a chinese person in the eye? with a credit card!

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

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Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

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Jimmy Saville

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Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

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What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

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How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

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"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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