Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If you were a cactus, why?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My peni s

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse, an apple, a leprechaun and a black man walk into a bar. They sit down and order drinks. The bartender looks at them and say "what is this, a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops