Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

what's mouthwatering and smells like fish? salmon

"I'm terrible at writing jokes." -80% of the people on here.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

Why did Sally's ice cream melt? She was on fire.

Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...