A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

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Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Choir.

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You are in a room with no doors and no windows. All you have a chainsaw and a mirror. How do you get out? You don't and will slowly die a painful death of asphyxiation.

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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Did i just hear a joke about birds? No? Well this is Hawkward.

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What did the business man say to the homeless person? Get a job

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

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One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

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what do you call a cow on a rollercoaster? a very dangerous and unlikely event

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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Why was the prison full of black people? Because they were all their for security internships.

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Guest what? Dog

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what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

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whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

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whats 1 + 1? 2

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Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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