kennah campion... being nice

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was holding on to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Pier pressure.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

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Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad at poetry Potato

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Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

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rarw

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

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What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

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What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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