What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

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Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

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My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

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What did the African-American toddler from Compton get for his birthday? Most likely nothing, seeing as his father left his mother briefly after his birth, and his mother uses all of her money to feed her heroin addiction.

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when push comes to shove, shove repeatedly explains to push that she needs to stop stealing his money and find a new place to live. Push then leaves, allowing shove to return back to his sofa and finish watching the basketball game.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

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roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops