How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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SHUT UP, yes you... WHAT DID I JUST SAY!!!!

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I was thinking... Love conquers all right? Remember the epic crying video? Satan: Because... Some where deep inside... I still love you... God:BUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAAAAUuuuaaaahhh... (Partially invisible effect hand of Satan pats God on the back) The universe is at peace with no opposing forces and I am Nerometal, not that asshole that claims to have one fist and is the leader of some sect, I am and will always be the original Moralman, my name simply happens to be Nero, and thats it, so I am not dissing the bible, why would I none of my business literally, but if love can be tha powerful eh?

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What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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Maths.

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y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? the pigment in their skin.

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Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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KILL WHITEY

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

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What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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How do you not get disappointed at the ending for "Mass Effect 3"? Don't play the game, dumbass.

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Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

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Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

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Why are Anti-jokes funny? Coz they are not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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