Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

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What did the boy's mother say to her daughter when she walked in on her father having sex with her grandmother? The grandfather said "how are you"? He wasn't a part of that fiasco. However I'm sure that whoever saw what was confused and looking for answers.

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

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Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

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Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

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What did the farmer say when he found his tractor? "There's my tractor."

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Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What do an elephant, and a banana have in common? Neither one is an ambulance.

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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