How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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An Irish man, Scots man and a Welsh man walk into a bar. The barman says, "what is this some kind of joke?!" Peter, who lives in Cardiff, returned home, depressed that he is viewed as some sort of clown. It reminded him of when he was a school boy; a giant spot appeared on his nose. The kids just laughed at him. "Don't worry Peter" he said to himself, "It will all be over now... He later hung himself. His family have been informed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet But i have commitment issues So I'd rather just be friends at this point in our relationship.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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I ran out of anti-jokes. However, here's a cool math puzzle. 492 357 816 Using every number from 1-9, each row added up equals to 15, horizontally, vertically, and diagonally. Here's another cool word play TEA URN BAY Words horizontally are Tea, Urn, Bay Words vertically are Tub, Era, Any Words diagonally are Try, Bra

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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One I grabbed a lump of coal, and crushed it with such strength, that a human being was born out of it. That man is today known as Chuck Norris. Nero.

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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Whats the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? Megan Fox is alive

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Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

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The rabbit owns a small business and has trouble getting a loan.

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Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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roses are red violets are hot dog this rhyme has no sense fork

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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What building has the most stories? The Burj Khalifa.

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Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

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Roses are read Vliolets are bloo I cant spell How about you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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