A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was there a red chicken? He tried crossing the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Its very nice.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was the cat in the bag? Because it's owner was abusive and put it in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

were did the gay guy go nowere because it was raining outside

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops