What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

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A kid a jew and a child molester walk into a room . what happens next? Nothing there in a room.

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Two carnivorous dinosaurs get into a fight. Carnage ensues and many baby dinosaur eggs are stomped on, and in the end they both die.

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Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

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Q: Where's the cheese? Who ate the cheese? A: How do you know it's been eaten because it's gone? Are you making the assumption that food that has disappeared was eaten because that is usually how food disappears? I am filing a lawsuit against you for your malevolent foodism.

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How do you make a great cake? Bett Crocker books

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What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

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anti-joke.com

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

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A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

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a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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Why did the boy fall of of his bicycle? He was hit by an asteroid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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