What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in an apple within a worm inside your apple...

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what do Russians play? Tetris, what else?

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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Hello everyone, if you couldnt tell, the most popular joke was removed because it wasnt even an antijoke, if you have a joke that isnt an antijoke, post it somewhere else, if you dont know what an antijoke even is then get the f*ck out, thumbs up if you agree with me

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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Uh, Liz, he is staring at the screen... He says you are right and knows, so he cant get mad, ill trust you both, but it better work, or this one is on me. Oh by the way, yeah he is eating, sorry its late here, and I am the only nurse here about now Ironically this place is full of doctors but they dont seem to give a crap about the man that pays their checks. Doctors said no, Nero said "you are fired" Doctor changes his opinion, glad to see he is taking charge around here, I am just worried about his sleep, he is beginning to halucinate and I doubt any stimulants will help. But fine, ill trust you, sorry, really shaking my boots here, I really do not want to, but this is not about me.

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Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance abuse, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life, and was appalled by his bad decisions.

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What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

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Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

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What do you feel inside after eating an entire class of pre-schoolers? A stomach ache

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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,Do you know what hapened to the janitor who cleaned the school halls? He finished the job, got paid a reasonable amount and went home to his average family.

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child labor

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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have you seen Stevie wonders car? No Neither has he

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Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

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A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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