Whats tha difference between blacktop and an airplane wing??? Well, alot. I bet you knew that.

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a guy was waiting for his date, then she arrived and they went happily to the cinema

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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Robin, get in the car, please.

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How come Asian's are so clever? Their baby food is blended textbook paste.

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Why did little Sally throw a stick of butter out the window? Sally has a burning hatred for dairy products.

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What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Beacuse he got kicked out of the bar

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm extremely unstable. And So are you.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? So it would not get hit

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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How do you make a clown cry? Hit him with a chair then rape his children

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Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

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What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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Why are hurricanes named after women? They're wet and wild when they come and take your car and house when they leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops