Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

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Committing Suicide #YOLO

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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Ehh

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What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

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Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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