Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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Why could the red heading boy sing higher notes than the blonde headed boy? He was castrated at birth.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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You are in a room with no doors and no windows. All you have a chainsaw and a mirror. How do you get out? You don't and will slowly die a painful death of asphyxiation.

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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Superman wears chuck Norris pajamas Just kidding superman is a fictional character and is uncapable Of owning pajamas

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops