What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

Roses are read Vliolets are bloo I cant spell How about you

It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

www.xnxx.com

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Some home health supplies. He really needed them, too.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? He made a very successful living for himself despite this rough economy.

Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

Stop Iran! We need the money.

What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

This is the same thing you told me once, believe me, it helps holding into it.

Whats black and has white cream in it? Oreos

It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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