Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why do black people love kool aid? It is cools them down on a warm summer day and it tastes great! OHHHH YEAAAAHHHHH

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q. When's The Best Time To Wear A Striped Sweater? A. All The Time.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did joe diragi cross the road there was food on the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man was shot. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

2

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q:why was steve sad? A:he had an extra penis

thumb_up thumb_down -27

in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

thumb_up thumb_down -27

roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops