How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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how many mexicas does it take to.... on wait there done

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roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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"Knock knock" Come in!

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Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

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boy and girl are flipping a coin, coin lands on heads, boy: get down bitch

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A man and a woman meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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