TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL! Cant we just dine at McDonalds? ITS THE SAME THING! Moral: Personally I love the taste of cardboard meat...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it? no, but it was home to several endangered species that are now extinct

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I rated up my joke then opened a new tab went to Anti-Jokes.com and rated it again. Problem antijokes?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the black guy say to the white guy? What did the black guy say o the white guy

thumb_up thumb_down -25

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: Where is the One Piece? A: My girlfriend is wearing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Once i was walking down the street when i saw a homeless man As i leant to give him money he jumped up and stabbed me. Now i don't approach drunk strangers with hangovers

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops