Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

Pickles are powerful

What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

Do you know what the worst part about inbreeding is? - It's runs in the family!

What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands, when they first came out. Well, I say bought. I actually stole it from a short, fat ginger kid.

rarw

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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