Tucker Rivera

Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

Yo Momma so fat, that the doctor prescribed her prescription drugs that deal with her eating disorder and recommended that she begin a low calorie diet and live a more active lifestyle.

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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