If you're happy and you know it get a life

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

What's clear and looks like water? Water.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

How did the woman get pregnant? She was thrown into a pool filled with semen.

What do you call a black person flying an airplane? The pilot.

Knock Knock Who's There Nobody Nobody Who?

Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

Sir, your wife is dead

What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

Why did the chicken cross the road? He saw a bottle of Faygo on the other side.

I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

Can I have a dollar? I don't know, can you?

So 2 guys are curious if there is baseball I heaven... So they say when either of them dies they have to come back as a spirit and tell the other man if there is baseball in heaven One of the guys dies and comes back as a spirit... He comes to the other man and says... I've got some good news and some bad news The man says what's the the good news? The spirit says the good news is there is baseball in heaven So the man says what's the bad news?? The spirit says... Your pitching Tuesday night!

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

Why didnt the 14 year old get her period? Because she had gotten pregnant by her father

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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