Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

What's the difference between a black male and a white female? There are many differences but all of which are wrong to make a joke about.

Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

Why could't Jerry go to school on the Wednesday? Because he died on the Monday.

Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

What did Grandma Sally give Little Timmy for Christmas? Herpes

Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

Whats worse than dropping your ice cream cone Your dad having brian cancer

Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

How did the dinosaur come out of the water? Wet.

Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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