Do you want to hear a bad joke? A bad joke

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

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Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

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Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

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Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

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What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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