How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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Why was the hasidic so stupid? He wasn't. He died in the holocaust.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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30cm = 0,3meters

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andrew wagner

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I named my cat Pounce because she jumps. In retrospect I suppose most cats do jump, in fact, they are even known for it.

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What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

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josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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What would Muhammed do?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

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When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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roses are red violets are blue i like elephants

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what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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