My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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How do you keep black people out of your backyard. A no trespassing sign.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because if you subtract 6 from 7 only one would survive.

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What's got four legs but can't move by itself? A chair.

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Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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how did the family die? They were shot in the head.

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Where do cows go to have fun? Cows don't have a concept of fun as such, but they would probably go to a large, sunny field full of lush, green grass with a bubbling river and plenty of shade.

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A pope meets another one

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A seal walks into a club.

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Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

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Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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One man says to the other man "Hello Sir, how are you this morning?" He replies "I am doing rather well, and how are you?" The first man replies "Quite good." And they continue about their day.

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What does a blonde say when she being raped? Ow it hurts stop... What does the guys who's raping her say? Oh shut up you know you like it...

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A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

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What is better than getting a job? Getting a better job.

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Why was john's balls itchy? Because he recently gained a severe infestation of pubic lice.

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During a boxing match, a white man faces an Asian. The Asian loses. Next the white man faces a Mexican. The Mexican also loses. Now the white man faces a black man. "Aw screw it!"

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And you honored it I see :P

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Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

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Whats red but smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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