Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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ROTFL = Reaching out to fellow lossers

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Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

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Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

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I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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