What's the difference between tires and a black guy? Tires don't scream once there are chains around them. ;)

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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How do you get a bunch of baby guts out of a bathtub? A lot of tostitos.

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There was a a round house with no corners.How many corners were there? 100 ,I never said that that it had to be that house.

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

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Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

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Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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Fine, ladies first.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black —Stevie Wonder

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

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what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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Whats the difference between an aboriginal and a deer? Nothing, infact they are quite similar, they have no house and smell like wild animals and jaywalk.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops