I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey man. what? squidbillies.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the young girl fall off her bike? Because somebody threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops