Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

What did the clitoris say to the labia? I'm from the hood, the clitoral hood.

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

HA HA HA HA HAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHYHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA - Bomber

why ya gotta be so rude? cause i can

A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

What is your name? My name is Jeff

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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