What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Not your cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I thought we where okay, you seemed so nice and calm before, are you okay? What happened?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I was watching this movie..... its over now.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? Because she had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Helen Keller name her pet dog? dfhiwueghweigw

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats small and sexually confused? YOu

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make a baby cry? You kill its mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops