How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

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whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

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Johnny has 32 cookies. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes, Johnny has diabetes.

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Error 37.

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

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Know what's funnier than the holocaust? Almost everything i can possibly imagine. The holocaust was a terrible case of mass extermination due solely to naxis racist views

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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What's funny about cheese? Nothing.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops