What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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How many baby's does it to paint a wall red? It depends how many you throw.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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What do you call a guy with no arms? Names.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

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Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Hey how is your wife and my kids

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive? ......because women cant drive(:

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

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Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

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What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops