What has two legs? Half a cat

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Justin's life

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you put your key on? A key chain.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

who is gay wit mon james cornish

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops