Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

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Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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How come Kristin cant go play soccer anymore? She broke her leg kicking her brother in the face.

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10 mexicans were driving in a car and went off a cliff. what happend? No one cares.

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What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

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What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am colorblind I hate my life

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops