Why did a black man put his hands on a white man? They were hugging.

A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

An elderly lady walks into a grocery store, and nothing of a great significance happens.

Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

among liedbtt is my Captcha code

Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

"Knock knock..." "come in"

Why did the guy have one shoe? Because he took one shoe off at a time

A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

What do you call a dick with blonde hair? Joffrey Baratheon.

Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

The man walked into the church and stayed there.

Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

how old is god? i don't know thats why i'm asking you. by: Brennan pickrell

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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