if ruddel jumped on your back what do you do leave him on or pull him offf? shoot him.

Why did the boy show off his ps4? Because his mom was rapped and murdered And his dad molested him when he was younger

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

A man walks to a baseball game what does he see? Many people

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

Why did the little boy sit next to the big boy? Because he wanted to get raped by big Jake!

Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...