What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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