A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

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whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

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Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

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What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

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Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

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Guy 1 : "I like your hat." Guy 2: "That's my hair, you moron."

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Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

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Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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I'm so punny.

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How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

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What do you call the Flintstones if they were black? N****rs

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Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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