Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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What did you get for your birthday? I got older

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i have yougurt mit traktor

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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Two Eskimos are in a bath tub. One says pass the soap. The other says no soap; radio.

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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A: Do you like it B: No

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Not Suzy" "Why?" "Because she has no arms"

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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