When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

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This is amazing! Visit http://psncodesonlinefree.com - you receive free PSN Card Codes instantly! Everybody uses this now!

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Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

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Roses are read Vilots are blue, I have a gun, Now get out of my house!!!

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

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Yo' mama's so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

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What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

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Give to the less fortunate. Date ugly people

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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what goes boo a sock

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Q: why was the man punched in the face? A: I did like him.

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops