What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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Why did a chicken cross the road? To see The Doors.

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

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Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

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How are baseball and the holocaust similar? They're both games, except for the holocaust

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he didn't have arms.

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What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops