A baby seal walks into a club.

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

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Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

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knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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What did the black man say to the Jewish man Nothing, because they were walking on the street and did not know each other

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Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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what is funnier than 24.....?????? 69. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. IT IS FUNNY BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE ME AND YOUR MAMA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Suck pussy

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A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

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What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

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why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

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A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

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The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

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How do you start a riot in Mexico? Roll a penny down the street.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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