Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

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"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

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Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

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Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

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A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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How to trick hundreds or religious people to drink cyanide? You establish a religious community in which you establish a ritual of drinking Kool-Aid once a day and one day switch the Kool-Aid with cyanide.

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

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Yo mama so old, she might die soon

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

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Rebecca Black sings a song.

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

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there was a little girl walking through a park. then she was kidnapped and most likely raped and sold to a foreign country.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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