Why don't men have menstruation? -Because it sucks

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

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Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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What's the best part of twenty one year old's? Their bodies have matured enough that the U.S. government deems it safe for them to consume alcoholic beverages with proper I.D.

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

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Unfortually last night Andrew McNeil was studying soo hard that his head exploded and the next day at school, his friends found out and then cheered with laughter and happieness.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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Do you know what's sad about 4 black men driving off a cliff in a convertible? They were my friends.

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

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Your adopted

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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