How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

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Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

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Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

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Want to hear a joke You're Adopted

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

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The Qur'an

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Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 5 dollars he would have 10 dollars

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All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

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what did the iPhone say to the other iPhone. we should not worry about that because iPhones are mute

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A black man provides has a normal day job and provides for his family while staying faithful to his wife.

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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Why couldn't the young african american read? He was born blind

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Does Fall come before winter? There is no defiant answer due to the fact that all seasons are in a cycle and our race has no answer to which season happened first on Earth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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